Autism, ADHD, and AuDHD Myths & Misconceptions: What People Get Wrong (and Why It Matters)
When people hear the term “AuDHD,” they often reach for the stories or narratives they already know about ADHD and autism…and those stories are often incomplete or flat-out wrong.
These myths can create real harm. They lead to people being misdiagnosed, dismissed, or misunderstood for decades. They leave many AuDHDers feeling unseen, confused, and even questioning themselves. Many worry they’re claiming an identity that’s not actually theirs to claim, because they don’t fit certain stereotypes.
So let’s unpack that. In this post, we’ll talk about common misconceptions about AuDHD, what we see instead, and why it matters.
Myth 1: ADHD and Autism are only “childhood” concerns.
Both autism and ADHD are believed to be neurodevelopmental in that you are born with an autistic and/or ADHD brain and the signs will first appear to some degree in childhood. The tricky thing is that there are many social and systemic factors that can impact how well we recognize ADHD and autism in kids. Most of our research and “classic symptoms” are actually based on research in little boys. For girls, nonbinary folks, and even other groups (e.g., folks of color), ADHD and autism are often missed.
Some folks also think that they developed ADHD or autism as an adult. Based on our current understanding, these traits and characteristics didn’t suddenly appear or start in adulthood. More likely, they became more noticeable as our stress and demands overwhelmed the coping strategies and systems that had been helping us mask until that point.
Myth 2: You can’t be autistic if you make eye contact (or you can’t be ADHD if you can focus sometimes).
Many people still think autism always looks like avoiding eye contact or rigid routines, or that ADHD always looks like constant fidgeting and getting easily distracted.
In reality, many autistic people make normal eye contact. Sometimes it’s because we’ve learned to mask or learned the rules and norms of what is societally normal for eye contact. Others who are uncomfortable with it may even focus on peoples’ foreheads or between their eyebrows so it feels less intense at times.
And many ADHDers can focus. In fact, hyperfocus (e.g., locking into a task for hours) is a very real part of ADHD. The problem isn’t never focusing, it’s inconsistent focus and difficulty shifting attention. Basically, the attentional concern with ADHD is that it’s hard for us to regulate our attention.
Myth 3: ADHD and autism cancel each other out.
Some assume that because ADHD is often linked to impulsivity and autism to routine-seeking, the traits somehow “balance” or cancel one another.
What actually happens is a blend.
Someone with AuDHD might crave structure and create detailed plans, then struggle to follow through because of ADHD’s executive functioning challenges. They might seek novelty but feel distressed when things are too unpredictable. The result is not balance or neutralized effects, it’s a layered experience that deserves it own understanding and support.
Myth 4: If you’re “high achieving,” you can’t be AuDHD. And if you’re autistic you “can’t hold a job.”
Many AuDHDers are successful students, professionals, and leaders. They’ve learned to mask their struggles, to work twice as hard to appear “on top of it,” or to channel their energy into work they care about.
Achievement doesn’t erase neurodivergence. In fact, many high-achieving AuDHDers are more likely to be overlooked because people assume competence equals “neurotypical.”
There is no one way that ADHD, autistic, or AuDHD people show up in the world. There are differences in social interactions, communication, sensory experiences, behaviors, and intellectual ability across different people.
At this time our Health and Human Services Secretary is Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and he has made wildly harmful claims about autistic people not paying taxes, holding jobs, or going on dates. This is not supported and creates such a harmful stigma for neurodivergent folks. There are some people who are both autistic and have intellectual or other disabilities such that they need and benefit from support of different kinds. That’s another one of those things that really differs from person to person. What does not differ, though, is that every one of us - regardless of what we do for work or pay in taxes - has inherent and unshakeable value and worth as a human being.
Myth 5: Autism is caused by Tylenol or vaccines.
Sigh. There is absolutely a problem in our society with using blame, misinformation, and thoroughly debunked claims to try to shape legislation and control/oppress women. I encourage you to believe doctors and scientists over politicians, and to remember that correlation does not equal causation. At the time I am writing this, the White House’s official website and our Health and Human Services Secretary are stating overtly false information about autism. And that’s wild. And terrifying. And lots of other things.
Here’s what we know:
The WHO, ACOG, FDA, and the widely supported consensus in the medical community all assert that there is no conclusive or quality evidence to support a link between a pregnant person using tylenol (acetaminophen) and their baby developing autism. Evidence suggest that genetic factors play the biggest role in autism (as in we appear to inherit this trait genetically).
Similarly, we have a lot of research and evidence to support that vaccines are not causing autism either.
Some further reading if you’d like:
American Psychological Association: Monitor on Psychology: Correcting misinformation about autism. https://www.apa.org/monitor/2025/09/advocate-autism-wave-misinformation
APA: Autism Spectrum Disorder: https://www.apa.org/topics/autism-spectrum-disorder
APA: ADHD: https://www.apa.org/topics/adhd/index
American Psychological Association Statement Addressing Misinformation: https://updates.apaservices.org/autism
Myth 6: Autism and ADHD are new or “on the rise.”
Diversity and variations in human neurology have always been there as far as we can tell. Sure, the terms “autism” and “ADHD” were coined at some point and over time our criteria for these and our methods for identifying them have evolved. With better screening, increased access to assessments, increased awareness among providers, and lessened stigma around neurodiversity, we have seen higher rates of diagnosis. That does not appear to be a rise in ADHD or autism so much as a rise in recognizing them.
Our invention of the telescope and improvements in technology over time have also helped us to discover new masses, galaxies, and phenomena in the universe. But they already existed. We aren’t seeing a rise in “things in the universe,” we’re just getting better and better at seeing and recognizing things in the universe.
Why Busting These Myths Matters
These myths aren’t just small misunderstandings that fade away on their own. They shape how people are treated, the care we receive, and even how we see ourselves.
When someone hears, “You can’t be autistic, you make eye contact,” or “You can’t have ADHD, you’re too organized,” they may start second-guessing themselves, wondering if they’re “imagining it” or if others think they are “faking it” for some reason or another.
Furthermore, professionals can miss people who need support because they don’t “look autistic” enough. Friends and family can assume someone is neurotypical/allistic because they’re high-achieving or have friends. This is especially true for women, nonbinary, and BIPOC folks who have been found to have higher rates of masking and to show up less often with symptoms found in the original groups studied (i.e., typically white school-age boys).
Challenging these myths allows people to better understand themselves and to begin getting support and information about what works for them to live and work in more fulfilling ways. It also makes for more accurate assessments, more affirming care, and less shame carried by people who’ve been trying to “pass” or “fix themselves” for years.
At its heart, busting these myths is not just about setting the record straight. It’s about creating a culture where people don’t have to prove their struggles or justify their needs just to be understood or supported.
From Clearing Up AuDHD Misconceptions to Embracing AuDHD Strengths
Now that we’ve cleared away some of the most common misconceptions, we can focus on what often gets overlooked: the strengths that AuDHDers bring to the table, and how those strengths can shine when they’re understood and supported.
We’ll explore these strengths in Part 3 of our AuDHD series!
And if you haven't read Part 1 (What does AuDHD Really Mean?) you can read that here!
If you are looking for neurodivergent-affirming assessment, therapy, or community, please feel free to check out our resources and schedule a free 15 minute consult call. Let’s talk about how we can help!
